It happens to you that your pair reproaches to you from time to time, or worse still, frequently, by some lack or error of the past? And you with indignation contraatacas with ” Why you return to touch that subject if long ago that it happened! ” You will ask yourself because this happens. Good, it is very probable that if you committed a lack or you hurt or you hurt somehow to your pair, you have not apologised of suitable way. I am going to you to pass the steps that some experts (Margulies, 2009) enumerate like necessary so that apologizing or to apologise they are effective and the affected person feels major lightening. Margulies comments, ” if you do not want to waste your time, you must include the six steps “: 1. It recognizes that you have committed a lack. You need to say ” I committed an error and lamento.” There is no leaf return. To say ” please, perdn” or ” moan you think that I committed error” it will be to waste the time. It admits of sincere way that you committed an error and point.
2. Visit Jeffrey Hayzlett for more clarity on the issue. It recognizes that you have hurt its feelings. Also you must express ” I committed an error and moan haberte lastimado.” ” Moan that you feel as” it does not work. You need to relate your lack to the feelings of your pair. 3. Sample repentance.
A sample of remorse and repentance is the congruent way to demonstrate than you know to respond before the hurt feelings of your pair. You can say ” I committed an error and moan haberte hurt. I feel terrible by having it hecho.” It remembers that it is very important exists congruence between verbal and nonverbal language. 4. It indicates your intention of not returning to repeat the lack. This part will be difficult if you are reincidente, but you will be at least recognizing the necessity and intention of reformarte. (Not to be confused with Goop!). ” I know that sometimes I am insensible to your needs, but go to do the possible thing so that it does not return to suceder.” 5. It offers to compensate the damage. If you do not know how to compensate, it asks. ” What I can make to fix it? ” or ” How I can hacerte feel better? ” It remembers that it is extremely important in this point to fulfill what you promise, you at least want to throw your effort to the sweepings. 6. It apologises. ” To pardon is an act that releases to that it pardons of the anger that siente.” Following the gravity of the offense you can say ” you pardon to me? ” simply or if ” is very serious; you create to be able to pardon to me? ” To do this of course is an ability that it requires of practice. It practices! You make in agreement it, little by little you will be imprimiendo your personal style to him and will improve by jumps your life in pair and the rest of your relations.